Life and AfterLife

 A topic that has been intriguing me quite few days now is afterlife. What happens when we die ? Is there truly an afterlife ?

There are multiple questions and no befitting answer. there are multiple scholars with so many views but none who can tell you what exactly happens. Does Karma kick in ? Are you taken to the doorway of heaven and hell and you get your entry based on the karma of your life. 

Science has taken so made so many leaps but we are still unaware of the basics of our existence. Where do we come from and where so we go after our mortal life. There are so many things we get attached to in real life and it's matter of seconds how the strings are unattached and you leave the world without any trace of your being except in the memories of loved ones. Do we know in the subconscious that one day we all will leave for good and everyone is just pre planned and we follow through. We have failed answers of everything. I see a lot of documentaries of people who had near death experience and how they saw the bright light. Does the bright light always stay in your subconscious and we are well aware. The universe is huge and we do not know where we came from and where we are headed to next. Where will all our energy be transferred.

It is true human beings are such helpless when it comes to life and death. Death as they say is inevitable and will happen to everyone. It's every single day we are taking one step towards it. And there is an unknown afterlife. Do we all go and immerse ourselves in this huge universe and never ever take another birth. Or is the human birth a boon that we get in return of all our good karma. We fail answers to everything and we pass everyday without questioning our present or past or our future. We live a shallow world of happiness which is as meaningless as our being. We do not realize that we are actually no one. We are some helpless beings who are born for some purpose or no purpose at all. We live in a world and do all our deeds without any clue of any reasoning. We die deaths. some mourn and some go unnoticed and another life is born. Life is precious and so is death. Every death brings the hope of a new life created on earth, We are mere human beings.

One day let's hope we all will get to know about death, our afterlife, our purpose of life and need of death. What happens to you in afterlife. Do we follow the bright life even after death and the light never tells us our actual purpose.

New girl in the city - 2012

How startling it is when your long cherished dream suddenly comes true. Life plays games all the time. As someone said "My favorite game is zindagi". Life always plays insinuating games with us every moment spinning some invisible net of stratagem.

It actually never fails to surprise you so that not even for a split second you loose interest. Because boredom cause consistency and consistency puts full stop. Things turned out to be the same for me. A long cherished dream, years of wait, struggle enormous fights and suddenly one day everything is all set and done. And the culmination is "A new girl in a new alien city". Far away from everyone she loved, cared and spent her days growing up with. Far away from the madding crowds of her city which she wanted to run away from, far away from the hustle and bustle. 

Chasing a long cherished dream the girl lands up in a city all alone all by herself. The initial days had to be tough. There was no support, no love that she was so much used to. Even the daily chores felt like the most difficult of things. The very own sky, the winds, the greens all seemed strangers. I sometimes ponder how we get connected with our own soil, our roots the moment we are born. An invisible string which gets attached and you only can feel it when you try to go far and it strains them. I think I would never had discovered this feeling if not I had decided to fly away.

There were daily challenges that kept waiting at every step. They say reality really hits you hard. Everything seems so much hostile. 

Nevertheless among all the strangers there were friends too ! After all its one world and human beings from all race, caste, creed are connected too. It takes time and exposure to realize this simple fact. The new girl in the city is no more new. A lot of relationships came and went away. Some stayed close to the heart and some faded away with time but nonetheless all went ahead to be memories. Looking back in time, sometimes it makes me smile how petty scenarios seemed huge, how friends came and held hands in time of need, how foes turned their back. They all are counted as experience. 

Sometimes it is so much necessary to come out of the love web and chase the dreams for yourself. The new challenges make you a different person all together and as the saying goes 'Who laughs last laughs best'.

Inner me ..

Love this part of the year when the festive season doesn't seem to end .. one after another all the festivals r just so lined up .. hate those initial months of the year when we wait for something but none does .. this is the part of the year we love and we expect this part to continue .. But this time something strange has hit me  .. I seem not to be happy  .. Going through a very difficult phase .. don't know what has suddenly stuck me !! I seem to be unhappy with everything around me .. on the contrary I should be happy about everything .. It's a strange feeling altogether when I am getting rude to everyone .. Every person is driving me nuts and I tend to react to everyone .. There was actually a time which I often boast of is that I don't fight with anyone .. i didn't indulge in the slightest of tiffs ever .. no matter how big a reason that was ..  But nowadays things are just so different. Feel so guilty .. helpless with the fact that I loose everything so easily and so often and I am loosing trust of all the people in the world whose trust I treasure .. Giving out all wrong signals to people ..
I tried counting reasons for the same .. and ended up with none .. Didn't find any suitable reason for why am I behaving so odd these days. What is it thats majorly going wrong within me. On second thoughts found hundred reasons for being this way .. A fight of sorts within me .. hard to describe, hard to put into words .. Hundreds of emotions rushing and the outcome is a strange feeling which is taking a toll on every relation I hold in this earth. Even the festivities going around fail to sooth me .. All the happy faces around me fail to make any impact and I tend not to love anything that is around me. Probably Waiting for a miracle to happen and I might find out my lost self .. the one who was actually me and not this person whom I fail to recognise sometimes in the mirror ..